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Papa Hari's Environmentally Friendly Freedom of Speech Law

Filed under: Humour and Nonsense by Hari
Posted on Fri, Jun 8, 2012 at 19:35 IST (last updated: Sat, Jun 9, 2012 @ 15:32 IST)

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Papa Hari News Service

Papa HariAfter weeks of debating the twin issues of protection of the environment and freedom of speech issues important to most social activists and other human beings, the Papa Hari World Government has finally come out with a Law that will combine the two into a unique blend of liberalism that is sure to satisfy everybody including social activists.

"This new law will be called the Papa Hari Environmentally Friendly Freedom of Speech Act 2012," said a Papa Hari World Government spokesperson at a Press Conference, "In this enactment, we have tried to protect the environment while at the same time preserving the freedom of speech of our subj... er... citizens." When pressed for details of the new law, the spokesperson continued, "At present we don't have the details yet, but the Act will reaffirm the freedom of all people in the World to speech and at the same time protect the environment. By this law, everybody will be protected and will have complete freedom to say whatever they wish without restriction. However, the Papa Hari World Government will continue to closely monitor and determine if any free speech or writing is offensive or harmful to the World Government and exercising its right to self-preservation on a case-by-case basis, cut off the electricity supply at the home and workplace of the offending party and in addition, ban them from using fossil-fuel powered vehicles permanently. By doing so, the offender will have no access to electricity for the duration of his/her life and we will also avoid burning fossil fuel, thus protecting the environment. I'm sure all activists will endorse this law, because we are concerned about their free speech rights as well as the environment and global warming and this law will simply help them comply with carbon-neutrality which they hold dear to their hearts."

While taking questions, the spokesperson assured journalists that they would continue to enjoy the benefits of freedom of speech to the maximum if they continue to support the Papa Hari World Government in their initiatives. "What's the loss of electricity and fossil fuel for a lifetime when compared to the unrestricted and undiluted freedom of speech? The fact that you may no longer be able to operate your printing presses or even connect to the Internet to update your Facebook page are merely small sacrifices to preserve energy resources and protect the environment. And oh, yes, you lose out on electric lighting and fans, air-conditioning comfort, television, radio, computer, refrigeration, washing machines and other little modern conveniences. But I am sure nobody can object to this law. After all, they can speak as much as they want and even write letters the old fashioned way using pen and paper! Those who enjoy the unrestricted freedom should be proud of their sacrifice in the greater cause of protecting our planet."

Many activists had expressed serious concerns about the law and demanded an immediate withdrawal. However, they could not be contacted since making their protest after the law came into force. An eminent jurist employed at the Papa Hari World Government Legal Research Centre assured all people that so long as they didn't offend the Papa Hari World Government, they would enjoy the twin benefits of freedom of speech and a safer environment. "This law is not unconstitutional as the World Government does not have a written constitution. It is a unique and historic legislation. Moreover, we are not taking away any of the basic rights or freedoms of our subj... er... citizens. They will continue to be clothed, fed and properly housed (at their own cost, of course) and even enjoy freedom of speech with all the benefits of a safer environment."

A Papa Hari Energy Corporation spokesperson, on the condition of anonymity admitted that the new law might reduce their revenues substantially and stated that it would have been better if the new law had imposed a tax on every word of free speech rather than cut off conventional energy sources to the offenders. "Let's hope the craze for super-free speech does not overwhelm the population!" he signed off.

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