Hari's Corner

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Papa Hari School of Politics

Filed under: Humour and Nonsense by Hari
Posted on Sat, Feb 9, 2008 at 20:14 IST (last updated: Mon, May 18, 2009 @ 16:58 IST)

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Papa Hari News Service

The Papa Hari Institute for Education of Overage, Unemployed, Useless Bums Wasting Time Doing Nothing (PHIEOUUBWTDN) has announced the creation of a new school of politics for young people over 60 years of age who wish to enter politics. In a press conference, the Dean of the Papa Hari School announced the syllabus for those who wish to evaluate the proposed course. The course has been split into 2 years with 4 semesters and 5 subjects in each semester.

Semester 1

  1. Basic Hypocrisy for Beginners - 20 hours
  2. Public Funds Mismanagement - 20 hours
  3. The Gasbag Theory: Dynamics of Hot Air - 15 hours
  4. Empty Promises Management - 10 hours
  5. Vote Banking - 10 hours

Semester 2

  1. Lying Cheating and Stealing - Part 1 - 20 hours
  2. Bribery and Corruption - Tips and Tricks - 20 hours
  3. Advanced Hypocrisy - 15 hours
  4. Horse Trading - 10 hours
  5. Disruption of Public Life - 10 hours

Semester 3

  1. Advanced Course in Rhetoric and Histrionics - 20 hours
  2. Lying Cheating and Stealing - Part 2 - 20 hours
  3. Political Backstabbing - Theory and Practice - 15 hours
  4. Foriegn Pleasure Holidays - Attending conferences - 10 hours
  5. Systematic Booth Capturing and Poll Rigging - 10 hours

Semester 4

  1. Dynasty Politics - Promoting your Lineage - 20 hours
  2. Responsibility Avoidance - 20 hours
  3. The Art of Doublespeak - 15 hours

Electives (4th semester - any 2):

  1. Rowdyism and Goondaism - 10 hours
  2. Tactical Intimidation Theory - 10 hours
  3. Minority Appeasement - 10 hours
  4. Family Improvement using Taxpayers' Wealth - 10 hours
  5. The Disappearing Act for Desperate Situations - 10 hours

The Papa Hari School invites all suitable candidates for the posts of professor, assistant professor and lecturer for the above subjects. Education qualifications needed: none. School drop-outs preferred. Experience: at least 10 years in politics. Age: preferably 60 years or more. The older the better.

Expressing confidence that all posts would be filled up in double quick time, the Papa Hari Spokeperson stated that those wishing to join the course would have to pay the entire course fee in advance. When asked for the reason behind this condition, he replied cryptically that the Institute wished to avoid the 'risks' associated with teaching sensitive subjects of the nature described above to impressionable minds.

Speaking about the reason for creating such a school, Papa Hari said, "In today's world, we see a lot of promising politicians who are experts in some areas of specialization but sadly lacking in others needed for success at the top level. We intend to turn out complete products who will be well versed in politics and serve their nations even better. Right now the polish is lacking. This school will give our students the edge in a wild, wild world."

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10 comment(s)

  1. Young people over the age of 60. Damn, you hit the nail on the head with that one.

    Comment by RT Cunningham (visitor) on Sat, Feb 9, 2008 @ 23:43 IST #
  2. Well, RT, I'm sure we can make an exception in your case even though you're grossly underage :-p

    Comment by hari (blog owner) on Sun, Feb 10, 2008 @ 07:13 IST #
  3. Hari, first of all, an excellent new template!

    And about the article: what can I say, Papa Hari rocks! :)

    Comment by Sudipta Chatterjee (visitor) on Sun, Feb 10, 2008 @ 14:50 IST #
  4. Thanks Sudipta. Yes, the header image (like all the others I've previously used) is from a photograph I took myself. :)

    Comment by hari (blog owner) on Sun, Feb 10, 2008 @ 17:51 IST #
  5. That was brilliantly done. Very funny in such a sad sad way as it says much about the quality of public officials the world over. Loved it.

    Comment by Grizzly (visitor) on Mon, Feb 11, 2008 @ 03:14 IST #
  6. Thanks, Grizzly. :-)

    Your making money online has also been my inspiration for the making money offline parody :-p

    Comment by hari (blog owner) on Mon, Feb 11, 2008 @ 07:10 IST #
  7. God save this country....

    Comment by Shrinidhi Hande (visitor) on Mon, Feb 11, 2008 @ 14:45 IST #
  8. Don't worry, Shrinidhi. Papa Hari is always there. :-)

    Comment by hari (blog owner) on Mon, Feb 11, 2008 @ 18:14 IST #
  9. Do you think politicians will spend 4 semesters taking this course? They would rather prefer to send someone in their name to write final exams...

    Comment by Shrinidhi Hande (visitor) on Tue, Feb 12, 2008 @ 10:31 IST #
  10. Shrinidhi, once they pay the fee (in full, at the beginning as we've said) we don't care who takes the exams or attends classes :-p

    Comment by hari (blog owner) on Tue, Feb 12, 2008 @ 12:41 IST #

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