Hari's Corner

Humour, comics, tech, law, software, reviews, essays, articles and HOWTOs intermingled with random philosophy now and then

20 facts about power cuts you need to know

Filed under: Humour and Nonsense by Hari
Posted on Tue, May 8, 2007 at 13:39 IST (last updated: Wed, Sep 26, 2007 @ 14:01 IST)

It's that time of the year - summer - and that of frequent power cuts in warm, humid, oppressive weather when the sea breeze decides to take a little break.

The Papa Hari Institute for Research (PHIR) has been studying power cuts for several years now and our panel of scientists have finally submitted their final report. They have reached the following conclusions. Note that most of the research was conducted in India, although many of the points might apply to other parts of the world as well.
  1. All power cuts happen when you least expect it. There is no exception to this rule.
  2. The duration of any power cut is inversely proportional to the strength of the instinctive initial hope you had of it being restored within 5 minutes. What you think after 5 minutes is immaterial.
  3. You always suspected it and it's now official. Power cuts have no soul, no heart and no remorse. They are also incredibly evil and the work of a higher power (no pun intended).
  4. Of a group of 1000 people who took part in our survey, the first reaction of 990 of them to power cuts were swear words of unprintable nature. The remaining 10 survey participants were dumb (literally).
  5. The #1 reason for power cuts attributed by the people involved in our survey was "transformer problem." Of these nearly 98% of them had only a vague idea of what a transformer actually is. Corrupt politicians and the neighbour's power-sucking air-conditioner also figured significantly as indirect reasons for power cuts.
  6. Nobody ever knows the real reason for power cuts.
  7. If you are watching television during a power cut, there is a 80% chance that you were watching the most interesting part of your favourite movie/programme/sport. Power is usually restored only when the closing credits are running or the game is over.
  8. If you're among a group of people when there's a power shutdown, there is a 70% chance that the general talk will gravitate towards the energy crisis in the world.
  9. You almost never get a power cut when you need a good excuse for not doing the homework you have to submit the next day. After unsuccessfully waiting all day long for that elusive power cut, when you finally decide to get the job done you'll get a power cut. And it'll usually last long enough to prevent you from doing it. (we already said power cuts have no heart or soul)
  10. If you are experiencing a series of power cuts, one after the other in quick succession, the last power cut in the series will usually be of the longest duration. You also finally figure out what they really mean by the term "Alternating Current."
  11. Power cuts which happen at night usually feel twice as long and ten times as bad as power cuts during daytime.
  12. Kids in the neighbourhood usually love playing screwy and irritating games like hide-and-seek during power cuts after dark.
  13. The cool, balmy breeze blowing the terrace or balcony of your house usually stops during a power cut at night in summer time. Just when you begin to get a little bit of breeze and you start enjoying the stars above in the peace and quiet of the neighbourhood, power is restored and the neighbourhood kids shriek with delight and disturb the peace.
  14. Just like the first rule of power cuts, power supply is restored at the exact point in time when you stop expecting it to be restored.
  15. A 20-minute power shutdown will usually last for an hour or more.
  16. You almost never think of a power cut until it happens.
  17. Contrary to what most people think, concentrating really hard on the electric light or the fan above your head will not somehow magically restore power supply.
  18. If a room has been cooled by air-conditioning before a power cut occurs, it will return to its normal temperature ten times faster than it took to cool down to that level.
  19. During a power cut, there will be at least one elderly person in a large group of people who will start lecturing about the time when people lived in comfort without fans, air-conditioners, electric lights and other such luxuries of modern times.
  20. And last but not least, the idea behind these kinds of research topics originate only during power cuts.

14 comment(s)

  1. heheheheh. Very true... I can verify the results of your research. Especially the one where if you really need power there will be issues, and if you start to enjoy the cut, the power will come back on. Power companies and evil electricians eh.

    Comment by titanium (visitor) on Tue, May 8, 2007 @ 17:46 IST #
  2. We truly enjoy the richness of power cuts in all their variety... we're lucky, aren't we? :)

    Comment by hari (blog owner) on Tue, May 8, 2007 @ 19:00 IST #
  3. Can i add one more point?!When there is a power cut.. there is a rise in INDIAN POPULATION :mrgreen:

    Comment by Logesh TamilSelvan (visitor) on Tue, May 8, 2007 @ 20:56 IST #
  4. Oh no.... Does that mean we'll soon be seeing Baby Haris running around? :shock:

    Comment by J_K9 (visitor) on Tue, May 8, 2007 @ 21:25 IST #
  5. Logesh, that's a very important point. :lol: Max, Baby Haris will soon take over the world. They're being produced in a factory at a secret location in large numbers, armed with super-powers. Mwahahahaha...

    Comment by hari (blog owner) on Tue, May 8, 2007 @ 22:08 IST #
  6. One more point: Some of the state electricity boards have a bad habbit of releasing news paper releases regarding the expected power shutdowns in specific parts of the town on a given day. Probablity that rest of the city suffers power cut is more than probablity of these specified areas...The very purpose of power cut is to save power. If you tell in advance there'll be power cut people will stay prepared (by charging their invertors, finishing electricity based tasks beforehand etc) and that defeats the very purpose...By:eNidhi India shock treatement services pvt unlimited

    Comment by Shrinidhi (visitor) on Wed, May 9, 2007 @ 12:45 IST #
  7. Yes, Shri. That's Rule# 21: Scheduled power cuts never happen.

    Comment by hari (blog owner) on Wed, May 9, 2007 @ 12:54 IST #
  8. Armed with super-powers? Well that's less than ideal... Now what am I going to do for a living?Oh, right... They're going to make me their slave. :shock: Get off this planet while you still can!

    Comment by J_K9 (visitor) on Thu, May 10, 2007 @ 00:22 IST #
  9. Not being allowed to participate in the research at The Papa Hari Institute for Research (by being in a different country), I had to do some of my own research. Power cuts are never designed to save energy. They're used for nefarious purposes such as political assassinations under the cover of darkness as well as forcing a population increase.Those were the two top two reasons that I came up with over a period of a year. I have new nieces and nephews to prove the second one and newspaper clippings to prove the first. There!

    Comment by RT Cunningham (visitor) on Thu, May 10, 2007 @ 07:09 IST #
  10. Max, since you're using Vista, the Papa Hari Task Force is already after you :grin:RT, your country lacks the rich variety of power cuts that our country has. We are proud of them :lol:

    Comment by hari (blog owner) on Thu, May 10, 2007 @ 07:36 IST #
  11. My vote for the best observation: #19!!In a sudden moment of inspiration, I had actually contributed to such a discussion at length once :)

    Comment by Sudipta Chatterjee (visitor) on Thu, May 10, 2007 @ 12:39 IST #
  12. Sudipta, you did? You are now awarded Papa Hari's Award for Proving Papa Hari's Theory Right (PHAPPHTR).

    Comment by hari (blog owner) on Thu, May 10, 2007 @ 14:02 IST #
  13. Chanced up on your blog through another blog, which i chanced up through another blog linked in my comments.Nice blog here. And oh, i hope there is no power cut here today. Does this mean there will sure enough be a power outage?

    Comment by Bungi (visitor) on Sat, May 12, 2007 @ 07:21 IST #
  14. Thanks for visiting and posting a comment, Bungi. As for your question, refer rule #1 of power cuts. :lol:

    Comment by hari (blog owner) on Sat, May 12, 2007 @ 07:25 IST #

Comments closed

The blog owner has closed further commenting on this entry.