Hari's CornerHumour, comics, tech, law, software, reviews, essays, articles and HOWTOs intermingled with random philosophy now and then
Papa Hari School of Politics Entrance Test
Humour and Nonsense by
Posted on Sat, Apr 12, 2014 at 21:35 IST (last updated: Sat, Apr 12, 2014 @ 22:16 IST)
|In this series||< Previous|
Papa Hari News Service
The Papa Hari School of Politics has come out with an Entrance Test for Indian political aspirants wishing to join its course. Following the election season in India, there has been an increasing interest in politics among the youth in the country and the Papa Hari Institute has decided to seize the opportunity to popularize its course. The head of the insitute, Sir Papa Hari himself, announced that the school was in the process of admitting students for the academic year 2014-15.
The press release also included the following Model test paper for students to get familiar with the question paper pattern.
Papa Hari School of Politics Entrance Test - Indian Edition
Model question paper 2014-15 (70 marks: 2 hours 30 minutes)
- You may send a proxy to write this test, provided you manage to bribe the examiners. If caught you may either be prosecuted or the matter covered up, depending on whether you belong to the ruling or opposition party.
- Copying is allowed on payment of "special charges".
- Extra time will be granted on payment of "special charges".
- The name and address of the evaluator will be outed if you have enough influence.
- Extra "bonus" marks will be available (guess how)...
Part A - Answer any five (5 x 10 = 50 marks)
1. Explain your strategy to influence and polarize the following communities for vote-bank politics with detailed analysis and illustrations:
- Linguistic minority (choose your language)
2. You are the head of a movement to bifurcate a state and you belong to the opposition party in that state. Explain, with examples, how you would agitate the matter and bring about the bifurcation successfully within a period of 5 years using any means, fair or foul at your disposal.
3. As the head of a political party, you are fighting corruption charges. Explain how you would:
- Divert the voters' attention from this fact at the time of elections.
- Get out of the case, by any means possible.
- Take revenge on the political opponents who did this to you.
4. Explain your strategy to handle the media, particularly channels that harass your political party.
5. Examine the following strategies to manage your ill-gotten wealth:
- Swiss bank account.
- Undervaluing your assets and tax evasion.
6. You are an important minister in the cabinet of ministers. Explain how you would schedule your foriegn visits to get the best possible holidays for your family.
Part B (5 x 4 = 20 marks)
1. You are a prominent member of your local body council and you are offered "special commission" from a contractor if you award him a hefty contract. What would you do and why?
- Negotiate the rates directly with him.
- Ask him to negotiate with your agent/assistant.
- Vaguely indicate the commission desired and leave no room for negotiation.
- Check carefully to see if he has any hidden cameras/microphones in the off-chance that it might be a sting operation.
2. If you had the chance to target your political opponents, which of the following would you choose and why?
- Attack their credibility generally.
- Foist false cases on them.
- Fall back on ideology and meaningless rhetoric.
- Strike a secret deal to leave them alone on the understanding that they would leave you alone.
3. You are desperate to win the election in a constituency where the majority of the voters belong to a particular caste. Which of the following strategies would you prefer and why?
- Promise the community backward status if not already backward.
- Choose a candidate who belongs to that caste for that seat and appeal to their sense of loyalty.
- Set the caste against another rival caste and polarize.
- Distribute money indiscriminately and hope for the best.
4. If you have to be populist in your election campaign, which of the following schemes would you promise and why?
- Consumer goods/freebies.
- 50 paise per Kg rice/wheat.
- Free lifetime electricity.
- Free lifetime mobile connectivity.